Death and Taxes

All U.S. citizens working and residing abroad are required to file and reports on their worldwide income.

- Unites States Government

 

Habari,

Hey folks, the above statement is imprinted on every U.S. citizen’s passport.  It is Uncle Sam’s way of telling us that no matter where we are in the world, we better have his money.  Now, there are some tax benefits to working abroad, but you need an MIT scientist to decipher the international tax code.  Good or bad though, everyone in the U.S. is required to pay taxes.  We playfully use the statement, “the only thing that’s guaranteed in life is death and taxes.”   

Some of you may quip about the inequality in the amount of taxes paid by each citizen and we all know there are criminals who don’t pay any taxes at all.  Rest assured that Uncle Sam’s henchmen will eventually bring these outlaws down.  With all of the criminal activity that goes on in America, the Taxman has succeeded where regular lawmakers have failed in bringing down the most notorious criminals in our history.  The message is clear, you can rob, cheat and kill as much as you want, but you better have Uncle Sam’s money.  LOL.  I’m just kidding… a little. 

Now I bring all of this up, because I found out a very interesting piece of information about Kenya this weekend.  My operations manager invited the team to lunch at her home.  There was one Nigerian, one Tanzanian, a person from the DRC, seven Kenyans and me.  Yes, I am embracing the continent!!  The television was on just for background noise and the problems of corruption in Nigeria came the screen.  This sparked a very interesting conversation about government officials. 

The Kenyans in the room informed us that their government officials don’t pay taxes.  WTF!! The hair on the back of my neck stood up and my mouth was hung open.  I was outraged.  I don’t understand the reasoning behind this even after they explained it to me.  In my opinion, EVERYBODY should pay taxes.  These government officials are some of the richest citizens in their country, but they pay no taxes.  SMH. Kenya really could use their tax money.  There are basic infrastructure problems that could be taken care of if their tax money was properly applied.

Every time I travel over impassable roads or sit in darkness because the lights went out in Kenya, I think about how our tax dollars are used in the States.  We complain about a bad pot hole here and there or the streets not being cleared quick enough after a snow storm, but we don’t have to face these kinds of problems.  If you want to get Americans to the voting poles, take away their basic comforts. 

Most Americans would not have the patience for this place, yet it has given me such an appreciation for the place I call home.  It seems unthinkable in America that our tax dollars wouldn’t provide the basic infrastructure, good roads, clean water and stable electricity.  Here, it seems to be something you  learn to live with.  I think I may have mentioned a meeting I was having with the Africa CFO and the lights went out.  We didn’t skip a beat while continuing our conversation in complete darkness.  True story.  While we were talking another group came into the room hoping they could use it even though it was pitch black.

 

Nairobi Kenya is one of the better cities in Africa.  It’s not as stable as South Africa, but you can live a normal urban life here.  I know I talk about the stranger parts of the experience, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.  Many parts of the land is beautiful and the weather is amazing.  As I write this, the temperature is 64 degrees, which is perfect for a person like me who hates to sweat.  The Kenyan people are some of the best I’ve met in the world. They work hard for their money and that amount is not a lot by U.S. standards, but they pay their taxes.  I think their government officials should too.

I will see you all back here next week.

Asante Sana,

Della Rochelle

Copyright © 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams

It’s Not Done, Until It’s Done

Habari, 

Well, about a month ago my work permit was approved by the Kenyan government.  Little did I know that it was just the beginning of a long process.  First, after the work permit was approved, the payment had to be processed.  Now you would think an organization or entity, of any kind, would process any payment coming to them very quickly.  It took three weeks for the process to be approved.  I was shocked.  

The next thing that has to occur was the stamping of my passport.  This will prevent me from having to stand in the long lines of tourist when I come back into the country.  Now, that almost makes all of this half way worth it.  I can’t tell you how many hours I have spent in the immigration lines.  The problem with this stamping is that you have to physically give your passport to a messenger and trust that he will return with it in a couple of days. 

Well, as you can all imagine, I gave the young man a nice talking to when I handed him my passport.  I made it clear what the consequences would be if even a page was lost out of my passport.  Now he smiled a cheesy grin at me, so I’m not sure he understood me.  I think he got the message when I showed him my fist.  Yes I did.  I’ll just say, my passport came back properly stamped and in one piece.

Now that my passport is stamped, and everything is approved, I have to go get my National Social Security Fund, Alien Registration Card, National Hospital Insurance Fund card and Tax Personal Identification Number (PIN). 

Every last one of these items could take a half a day’s work to get done properly.  Now this is how I know I have grown since I left the United States.  I have learned patience and tolerance on a whole different level.  I have given up the urge to give the rude woman behind the desk a piece of my mind when she gives me attitude when I ask her a question.  I have stopped displaying my frustration when I’ve waiting in line for what seems like hours when the person behind the desk moves at a snail’s pace.

Nope, I have learned to entertainment myself during these trying times.  Thank God for the I-Pad.  I can entertain myself for hours with this one little device.  Now, some of you may say, you need to be careful carrying an I-Pad openly in a foreign country.  All I can say in response to that is, the amount of frustration I build up in these situations, couldn’t find a better target to be unleashed upon, than on the individual who tries to steal my I-Pad.  As much as I enjoy some of the theater that goes on these situations, having anything stolen from me would force me into a temporary psychotic break. 

I have to ask you all to pray for me over the next few weeks as I attempt to obtain the rest of my government documents.  I’m sure the adventure obtaining each document could serve as its own blog entry.  As I settled into my alien life in Nairobi, I’m sure I will have tons of stories to tell and those that I can’t tell in this open forum.  The list of untold stories is really starting to pile up.  SMH.  My face to face conversations will be very interesting for quite some time. 

Well folks, I’m going to close this out.  Next week I will tell the story of obtaining my NSSF and alien cards.  It’s bound to be entertaining.  Until then…

Asante sana,

Della Rochelle

Copyright © 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams 

Fit and Funky in Turkey

Habari,

Hey folks.  I’m finally back.  I’m sorry for the long delay.  Thanks to all of you who reached out with concern for my welfare.  I’m doing fine; I was just going through a little something.  For a moment there it looked like my assignment was going to come to an abrupt end.  I think I was subconsciously distancing myself in preparation for the end of the assignment.  The good news is that the Kenyan government approved my work permit the week of May 28^th.  I returned to Kenya last week and am on target to be completely official by the end of the month. 

In the middle of all of this, I had the unique pleasure of vacationing in Marmaris, Turkey with my dear friend Carol and over 70 Fit and Funky British citizens.  Fit and Funky (www.fitandfunky.com) is a group of fitness trainers and fitness junkies who travel the world once a year for a fitness holiday.  Now those of you, who know me, know that I could never be accused of being fit, but I can get funky with the best of them when I feel like it. 

My girl Carol had signed up for this trip on her own, but then decided she wanted to have someone go with her.  You all know my motto, “have passport, will travel.”  She assured me that I could do as much or as little as I wanted to do in terms of the fitness stuff.  These folks were hard core though.  You had your choice of fitness classes every hour from 9am until 12pm.  Some of the diehards took a class each hour.  That’s four hours of fitness!  Now I would have to recuperate for the rest of the day if I was crazy enough to even attempt that much exercise in one day.  But, these people would eat, shower and shop or sit on the beach for the rest of the afternoon. 

That’s not where the day ends though.  Almost every night they went out to the clubs.  You will notice that I said CLUBS, because the group went to at least two clubs a night.  The really cool part was the fact that they travel with their own DJ.  Now that is hot.  It was prearranged with the hosting clubs to let their DJ take control of the club while the Fit and Funky crew was there.   The clubs definitely became livelier while the Fit and Funky group was there. 

I didn’t make it to most of the fitness classes (okay I only went to one), but I made it to the clubs.  Now there was a difference in the type of music Londoners like to play at a club and what Americans like to dance to.  Don’t get me wrong, the music they like to listen to makes you say, “Aw damn that’s my jam,” but you sort of nod your head to it and maybe pop your fingers.  It’s what you would do if you heard your song on the radio.  Now in America you would hear songs in the club that guarantees your presence on the dance floor, like Mary J’s remix of “Just Fine” or old school joints like, “I Know You Got Soul, “ by Eric B and Rakim.  Nevertheless, I enjoyed the time out with them.

The funny thing is, the early bus came to pick people up at 2am.  Yes, that was the early bus.  After hours of listening to heart pounding music and inhaling cigarette and manmade smoke, I was ready for the early bus.  I couldn’t hear anything and my throat was destroyed from yelling all night.  The subtle reminders that I wasn’t 20 years old anymore were quite annoying.

Usually when I travel with Carol she is the one travelling with a group of Americans and trying to understand our slang and humor.  I never thought it would be so difficult to understand a group of people who claim to speak the same language.  Carol warned me that I would have particular trouble understanding the East Enders, but good lord!  There were times when I actually thought they were speaking a different language.  SMH.  I felt bad when I had to ask people to repeat themselves, especially when they were so passionate about what they were saying.  Sometimes I just nodded in agreement or laughed with them to keep the momentum.  LOL.  Carol was an interpreter for some of the slang when she was around to hear it.  I will never take Carol’s experience for granted when she is traveling with us Americans again.  Carol you are a real trooper.

All and all, I had a great time hanging out with the Fit and Funky crew.  Next year they are going to Cyprus next year.  I’m thinking very seriously about going.  This time I will do a better job on the fit part. LOL.  There is a part two to this adventure that I like to call, “A Tale of Two Men.”  I will continue my Turkish drama next week.  Thanks for tuning back in folks.  I promise no more disappearing acts.  See you next week.

Asante Sana,

Della Rochelle

Copyright © 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams

On Shaky Ground

Habari,

As I enjoyed my last few minutes of divine sleep this morning, I was rudely awakened by the shaking of my bed and the rattling of the windows.  Now, anybody who knows me knows that I am NOT a morning person.  Interrupting my sleep in the last few minutes before the alarm sounds could be hazardous to your health.  But, this morning, at about 5 am, Mother Nature decided I needed assistance getting out of the bed. 

When the bed first started shaking, an earthquake was not the first thing that came to my mind.  As you all know, we are in the long rainy season.  The thunder and lightning here can be quite vicious, so I attributed the shaking to lightning hitting the building.  Now, the fact that I didn’t jump up and run for safety speaks volumes about how living in Kenya has shaped my outlook on things.  LOL. Some of you may remember I wrote about the security wall in my compound being blown up by a lightning strike last year, so this was not a farfetched notion.

After the first few seconds of shaking, my eyes opened slightly.  I started to wonder if this was going to be one of those real earthquakes. You know the ones that register at 8.0 something on the Richter scale.  I remember feeling quite annoyed just thinking I would have to get up and leave the apartment in my pajamas.  As I waited for the excitement to end, I wondered what I would do to ensure my safety.  I had absolutely zero confidence that the building I resided in would survive a ‘real’ earthquake.  The building codes of this fine city have been the topic of discussion all week.  SMH

Nairobi at Dawn

Just as I was about to disrupt a perfectly good sleep, everything came to a halt.  The tremor lasted about 10 to 15 seconds.  It seemed like a really long time.  I thought to myself, oh good now I can go back to sleep.  One of the reasons why I wasn’t too excited about this 4.9 earthquake is because I read, before I came, that Kenya was prone to minor tremors and earthquakes due to its proximity to the Rift Valley.

When I finally got up for the day, I started checking the apartment for signs that an earthquake occurred.  There were a few minor cracks in the walls, but some of them I had seen previously.  This earthquake and last week’s floods got me thinking about what I would do if there was a real disastrous event.  Well, I purposely didn’t bring anything fancy to Kenya.  Over the holidays I took home anything that had any real value after losing two pairs of shoes and a skirt to the mud.  Nothing fancy is really needed here.

 My friend Sookie (her real name is Colleen) asked if they had renter’s insurance here.  I had to laugh when I saw the question, because it wasn’t even a consideration to get any.  I’m sure it would be an ordeal trying to get your money if you had renter’s insurance and something did happen.  In a place where you have to go pick up the police if your house is robbed in order for them to investigate (and you better have a little something extra), I won’t hold my breath thinking that a bunch of insurance claims would be honored if my personal belongs were damaged.

Well folks, I’m going to close this out.  Join me next week when I will talk about ‘The Round About.’ It has to be done.  See you back here next week.

Asante Sana,

Della Rochelle

Copyright © 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams

The Rains are Here!

Habari,

I have always enjoyed a good storm.  I like the smell in the air right before the rain begins and I love watching the downpour as it saturates the landscape.  I even like the occasional rumble of thunder and strike of lightening, as long as no major damage is done, of course.  The key word here is occasional.  The heavy rain season has begun in Nairobi.  It rains just about every day and it’s the kind of downpour that gets your attention and makes you go to the window to make sure you weren’t imagining things.

Last weekend ended with a torrential downpour that forced my upstairs neighbors to abandon the penthouse.  The rain was so heavy that it woke me out of my sleep.  It sounded like there was a huge waterfall outside of my window.  I could also hear my neighbors up walking back and forth in their apartment.  The hysteria in their voices made me think there was a leak of some sort in the bedroom of the apartment.  Since it was 2 o’clock in the morning and quite chilly, I was reluctant to get out of my bed to investigate the possibility of leaks throughout my apartment.  I sent up a quick prayer (I know God has better things to do, but still) asking God to spare me the trauma of having my things ruined and having to move to another apartment.

After I said my prayer, I went back to sleep listening to the melody of the deluge going on outside my window.  I woke up in the morning to the sounds of my neighbors and the cleaning staff walking frantically around the penthouse.  As I made my way to the kitchen, the door bell rang.  When I opened the door, I was met by two members of the cleaning staff carrying buckets and mops.  The hallway and stairwell were drenched and covered with leaves from the numerous trees located on the property.  Water had also poured through the elevator rendering it useless.  I can’t tell you how pissed I’ve been about having to walk of five flights of stairs at the end of an exhausting day with my heavy work bags. SMH. 

Apparently the unleveled floor that I frequently tripped over when entering the apartment prevented the flood of water from entering my apartment.  The cleaning ladies were amazed that my apartment was spared.  They kept telling me how lucky I was that the apartment was dry.  It wasn’t until then that I started to look around the apartment in search of water damage.  All I found was a wet spot on the ceiling in the area between the living and the dining rooms.  I guess God was taking small request that night. J

The constant rain is starting to wear on my soul.  Master Pu has told me I can’t let that happen because there’s a lot more to come.  The rain itself isn’t the main problem.  It’s the conditions it creates in and around the city.  First of all, once it rains, you can forget about getting anywhere in traffic.  Last week I spent nearly three hours in traffic even after leaving the office early.  Once you understand the conditions of the roads around Nairobi, you can understand why things slow to a crawl.  You could lose your entire car in some of the pot holes here.  If you add water to the situation, things could be disastrous and often are.

The flooding and landslides that result from the heavy rains are inevitable, but surprisingly people manage through them.  Tragically there was a fatal landslide in the slums of Mathare after last week’s rains.  40 homes were destroyed and 8 people were killed.  I could spend fifty blogs talking about the dangers of these slums and still not tell the whole story.  As shocking as it is, it is unexplainably accepted. SMH. 

Considering the fact that we are at the beginning of the heavy rain season, I will have to learn to adjust.  I love watching rain storms from the comfort of my home.  Having to go out in the elements and experience them first hand is not something I look forward to.  I guess the rain boots, poncho and umbrella that were given to me by my Tyco friends will come in handy.  See you all here next week.

Trying to stay dry,

Della Rochelle

Copyright © 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams

Homesick

Habari,

Folks, believe it or not, this week was even tougher than the last.  Not because I’ve been devoured by more bugs, but because for first the time, I really miss home.  My adjustment back to Kenya has been slow and work has been on my last nerve.  This week we had our first knock down drag out fight with our client.  The honeymoon is definitely over. 

Now, I’ve spoken in the past about the brawls that break out in our normal meetings.  Master Pu has referred to the activity as, “going to a fight and a meeting breaks out,” but I’ve learned that these are just love taps like those shared between siblings.  Although we all care for our siblings, very few of us have resisted the urge to knock the shit out them from time to time. 

That has been the relationship we’ve shared with our client, but this weekend was way different.  First of all, we were all working on another damn Saturday.  Now, I’m not afraid of hard work and long hours, but if you ask me to come in on Saturday, it can’t be just to kick my behind.  I was upset that my Saturday would be impacted by this impromptu meeting, but you will all be very proud of the fact that I didn’t lose my cool.  Oomph, I wonder if Master Pu can say the same. J You see, I just sat there with my lips pursed because I wholeheartedly believed the onslaught was unfounded (turns out I was right). 

I thought my entire weekend was ruined, because I also had to prepare for yet another audit starting on Monday.  It turned out pretty nice though.  One of the executives on the account who is Vietnamese American invited me and two members of my team to hang out with her for a girl’s day out.  First we went to a restaurant in a nice hotel called Ole Sereni that sits on the edge of a Kenyan National Park.  The name of the hotel is taken from the Maasai name for the area meaning 'place of tranquility'.

Ole Sereni Hotel Restaurant

We sat out on the terrace where you can actually see some animals, nothing too hair-raising.  The entire time we were there, there were a couple of impalas grazing in the field.  I took a picture, but it didn’t come out very well.  I remember thinking to myself; this is why I came here.  I’ve also seen ostriches and giraffes in the park.  The park and hotel are actually across the street from our office.  I could feel my mood lifting as soon as I took a sip of my drink.  LOL.   Just kidding. 

We went out to a shopping mall called Junction that I hadn’t been to before.  This was a nice little mall, nothing like the Sandton Sun in Johannesburg, but cute.  Once we walked and shopped until we were tired, she is a girl after my own heart...she tried on four pairs of shoes and bought 3.  LOL.  We were tired and decided to head to her home for dinner.  She had offered to cook for us.  Now, I didn’t mention it, but when we first got in the car, I realized where our differences lie. 

You see, when we went to put our bags in the back of the car, we realized that she had a large bag of chicken feed in the trunk.  Yes, I said chicken feed.  Turns out, she has chickens in her yard.  At first I thought, who the hell goes on international assignment and buys chickens to put in their backyard?  I’ve seen a chicken killed when I was little and I wasn’t hungry enough to have her wring one’s neck for our dinner. 

What I found out was kind of cool.  She keeps the chickens so she can have fresh eggs.  What happened to going to the store and buying a dozen?  SMH.  Who knew?  We ended up having a very relaxing girl’s day out.  You all know how therapeutic that can be.  The discussions we had helped me remember why I’m here.  The change in mood has helped me tremendously, because the week is going well so far.  Well folks, that’s going to do it for me this week.  I will see you here next week.

Asante sana,

Della Rochelle

Copyright © 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams

Fresh Meat

Habari,

Folks, this has been a tough week.  I must have been gone from Nairobi too long because the bugs here thought I was fresh meat when I returned.  The first day back to the office, I decided to work late and the mosquitoes had a feast.  The worst part about it was that I didn’t feel the bites.  The next morning I woke up feeling lethargic and sore.  When I looked in the mirror, I had bites all around my neck and across the right side of the face.   I mean, I was just talking about a few lumps, I looked liked a battered woman. 

When I made it to the office, my staff was stunned by the number of bites and concerned about how they were swelling.  I was going out of my mind with the itching and scratching, but I had to stay in the office because we had auditors onsite.  I was scheduled to be interviewed by the auditors that morning and I couldn’t disappoint them.  You all know how auditors can be. 

The funny thing was that our CFO was scheduled to be interviewed with me. Michael is known for coming to the office very early or staying late at night.  So, needless to say, he was also the victim of the mosquitoes. 

When we went into the room to meet with the auditors, their faces said it all.  We looked like a drug addicted couple who had just had a fight.  LOL.  With his arms all tracked up and my neck and face swollen the auditors couldn’t help but wonder what the hell happened.  One auditor even asked the CFO, “What happened to you?” He explained the infestation we suffer through in the office and her eyes bugged out a little bit. 

I had gotten to the point where I wasn’t obsessed about taking my malaria pills, but at that point I checked my supply and documented the last pill I took.  The itching and scratching was driving me crazy and I wanted to go back to my apartment and slather myself with anti-itch cream.   Having clothes on at that point was offending me.  Finally, I left the office and returned to my apartment.

Within a few days the itching subsided and my neck and face returned to normal.  Next thing I knew, five tiny bites showed up on my right hand in a trail.  In no time at all, the bites started to swell.  By the next day, my hand was the size of a small loaf of bread.  Everyone agreed that I should go to the emergency room.  Now, this was the one thing I swore I would not do while I was in Kenya.  I had heard all kinds of horror stories about the hospitals and I really didn’t want to go unless I was bleeding profusely or completely unconscious.  I know that sounds crazy, but this is the point I had reached.

However, my arm was continuing to swell and it freaked me out.  The itching fits I went into were making everyone else in the office itch.  Needless to say Master Pu told me to get out of his daily meeting and go to the hospital.  Now, with my preconceived notions about what Kenyan hospitals were like, there was no way I was going to the emergency room alone.  I asked my trusted employee Kangai to accompany me to Aga Khan Hospital.

I had heard good things about Aga Khan, but I still didn’t want to go there.  I don’t know if I thought I was going to go into a refugee camp of something, but I was scared to death.  Once we reached the hospital, I was pleasantly surprised by the normalcy of the waiting room and it wasn’t crowded!  The second concern I had was whether my insurance would be taken. 

I heard stories about having to pay cash before doctors would even touch you.  I couldn’t imagine how much money I would need.  Now, I was also thinking with an American view.  When I got to the admin desk, I discovered that my insurance wouldn’t kick in unless I was admitted (scary thought).  Then he told me the fee would be the equivalent of $15.  I was relieved because I had that amount in my purse. 

After I paid the fee, we were told to go wait outside of the exam room.  It wasn’t long before the nurse called my name and I went into the exam room.  I was pleased to find that the exam room looked a lot like exam rooms in the States.  My pressure was taken using the same machines we use in the States.  I wasn’t surprised when the nurse told me my pressure was up.  I had worked myself up thinking about what I would find in a Kenyan hospital. 

The only strange occurrence happened when the nurse went to take my temperature.  She looked at me strange when I went to open my mouth.  Why wouldn’t I open my mouth, isn’t that where you put thermometers?  Well, not here.  She put the thermometer under my armpit.  Had couldn’t help but laugh at myself.  LOL

The rest of my hospital visit was a non-event.  The doctor told me I had an allergic reaction to the venom of the bug that bit me.  Now, I never saw the bug and I still don’t know what it was.  I had my landlord replace everything in my apartment and fumigate the place.  I wear strong bug repellant to the office and I carry bug spray to work.  It doesn’t matter how I smell, I’m convinced my prince charming is not in Kenya. L  Anyway, the doctor gave me antihistamines and I got some Benadryl. 

You will all be happy to know that my arm has returned to its normal size and the bug bites are disappearing without any marks.  It has taken a few days for me to feel comfortable again in my apartment and I still jump at everything that brushes up against my skin in the office.  I hope I don’t have any more incidences like this in the next 21 and half months I have left here…yes, I have started to count.

Well, I will see you all back here next week…hopefully bug bite free.  Stay tuned.

Asante sana,

Della Rochelle

Copyright © 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams

Back to my home away from home

Habari,

Finally!!  Finally I’m back in Nairobi where I belong after spending 11 days in Johannesburg.  I always enjoy my stays in Joburg.  The IBM team always ensures I have a good time.  This trip was no different.  I actually left before the fun was over.  Because I left early on Saturday morning, I missed the opportunity to go to the Phantom of the Opera.  Now the Phatom of the Opera sounds bourgeoisie, but this trip went from the high highs to the low lows. 

My IBM Host wanted to show me the ‘real’ side of Joburg this time.  Being a hood rat from North Philly, I’m more than capable of being ‘real.’  BUT, being real in another country can be a little stressful. LOL.  My Host decided to take me to her version of Chinatown.  Every city in every country has a Chinatown.  When we pulled up, the hair on the back of my neck stood up.  This was definitely ‘real.’  As we got out of the car, the smell almost knocked me off my feet. 

Those of you who have been to your version of Chinatown know the smell I’m talking about.  It’s the smell in the back of the restaurant that you try desperately not to recognize because you enjoy the food so much.  I tried very hard not to think of the fact that I was smelling that smell in a different country.  This is South Africa anyway, right?  Certainly I could trust the food here.  Besides, I reminded myself that that smell exists in several different Chinatowns in various cities in the good old USA.

Once I got past my initial reservations, we had a good time and good food.  I was out with my Host, her son and a friend of the family.  We had a great time talking about Joburg’s history and American politics.  I’m always amazed by how preoccupied people in different countries are with the political landscape of the US.  I guess it’s a big deal now because it’s a presidential election year.

Our next outing was much more upscale, but just as interesting.  It was a lovely restaurant called Moyo, which was situated in a outdoor square.  This was a very charming location with one small exception.  There was a thunderstorm brewing in the background.  Now, for anyone who has been to Johannesburg, you know that their thunderstorms are vicious.  This was no exception, but everything progressed as planned, much to my surprise.  You see, the tables were completely covered and I discovered that South Africans have no problem dining outside in the rain as long as they don’t get wet. 

Once I realized we wouldn’t get wet I was a little more relaxed, but there was still the pesky issue of the thunder an lightening.  No one seemed as on edge as I was so I tried to go with the flow.  Then the waiter came out with the menus.  Now, I couldn’t make this up people, the menus were made of metal! SMH.  No one else seemed to mind so I just ordered quickly and gave the menu back to the waiter.  The good news is, the storm never materialized.  Once we got the conversation going, I completely put it out of my mind. 

Female Bathroom Door

Male Bathroom Door

As usual, I enjoyed the meal, conversation and atmosphere.  There was a jazz band playing while we enjoyed our meals.  When nature called, I went to the bathroom to discover once again that South Africa has a fascination with clearly identifying male and female bathrooms.  See if you can tell the difference between the two. LOL.  And this was in a nice restaurant! 

Well, I had two more restaurant outings during my stay, but it was just more fun.  I finally started my journey back to Nairobi on Saturday.  The four hour flight was nothing compared to the jaunt from the States.  My entry back into the country was surprisingly uneventful.  Maybe it was because I landed in the middle of the afternoon, but I breezed right through customs.  

When I walked outside, the airport, the wall of heat smacked me in my face.  Welcome to summer in Nairobi.  Ugh, I wasn’t liking it at all.  But, when I entered my apartment which hadn’t been occupied in two and a half months, it was surprisingly cool.  I put all of my stuff down, collapsed on the coach and exhaled.  It was good to be back in my home away from home.

See you back here next week folks.

Asante sana,

Della Rochelle

Copyright © 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams

Stranded in Johannesburg

Habari,

Well, looks like I will be camping out in Johannesburg until my papers are approved in Nairobi.  I arrived last Wednesday morning after travelling for a day and a half.  I left the US on Monday night and I didn’t reach Joburg until Wednesday morning.  Needless to say I was exhausted.  Unfortunately when I got the hotel, they didn’t have my room ready.  Not only did they not have my room ready, but they didn’t have any record of my reservation. 

Now you know I am usually the level-headed person who never loses her cool…not.  LOL. The man behind the desk saw the eminent meltdown written all over my face.  Before I could say a word, he instructed the bell hop to take me to the business lounge on the 6^th floor.  He assured me that they would straighten everything out.  Now you know I didn’t believe a word he had to say, but I was tired, hungry and I hadn’t had a drop of coffee…the Starbucks withdrawal was in full swing. 

I agreed to go to the business lounge to rest a little and regain my strength.  After I reached the lounge, I was a little more hopeful.  It was very nice and there was fresh fruit juice, coffee, cappuccino and espressos just waiting for my request.  The women at the desk spoke in soft reassuring tones.  I wondered if the guy downstairs called ahead to say, “There is a crazy b*!@% headed your way and she’s on the brink of a meltdown.

After the first cup of coffee and some really good mango juice, I started to feel a little more human, although I still had day and a half old clothing on.  I wanted to just go to my room and take a shower.  I decided I was going to try to resolve the issue myself.  I reached out to the people, who handle my travel, but they were in London and it would be another 2 hours before they reached the office.  My second instinct was to reach out to Master Pu by text and warn him of the meltdown at hand.  He responded to my text with mild concern.  I had this sneaky suspicion that his concern was for the people in the hotel and not me. LOL. 

Before I could lose my mind, the soft spoken young lady came over to me to let me know she had straightened everything out.  I was pleasantly surprised.  I took back every bad thing I said about them up to that point.  LOL.  She gave me a room on the 17^th floor and apologized for the delay.  All I could think about was the shower and the bed and I wasn’t disappointed by either.  Check out the pictures of my room.  If I’m going to be stranded somewhere, I don’t mind it happening here.  When I called Master Pu to tell him everything was okay, the first thing he said was, “Are you in jail?  Do you need a lawyer?” LOL.

My actual room

I tell myself every day, Johannesburg is no Nairobi.  As you can see, I’m not suffering at all.  I’m being further disillusioned by staying in South Africa.  You see, South Africa is like a mini US.  The roads are nice, leveled and clean.  The mall shopping is wonderful; I’m talking Louis Vuitton, Fendi and Salvador Ferragamo.  See, staying in South Africa can not only make me disillusioned, but broke as well.  SMH. 

So, I’m taking it day by day.  I may write from here next week or it could be from good old Nairobi.  Come check it out next week to see where I end up.  Until then…

The Mall attached to hotel

Asante Sana,

Della Rochelle

Copyright © 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams

Temporary Insanity

Habari,

Finally I am heading back to the continent of Africa.  I'm writing this entry from the London Heathrow airport.  I have a five hour layover before I head to Johannesburg, South Africa.   I have been in the US since December 17th and I've adapted far too much to the comforts of home.  With the exception of sleeping during normal sleep hours and working during normal work hours that is.  You see, somebody had the crazy idea that I could work on Nairobi time during my extended stay.  Crazy!!

First of all, Nairobi is eight hours ahead of the east coast.  That means, in order to do a normal 9 to 5 work day, I would have to work from 1am until 9am.  Well, I thought that was just crazy so I settled on 11pm to 7am.  Still crazy...I know.  The first couple of days were horrible!  I felt like I was losing my mind. Although I had every intention of logging off at 7am sharp, somebody or some crisis always caused me to work until 8 or 9 in the morning. SMH.

After a while things got better, but I was going to sleep right after work and sleeping most of the day.  Sometimes when I would get up, it would be dark again.  WTH.  My days started to run together and I started to lose track of them.  The thing is, I would have already worked the day in Nairobi, but when I was done the day was just starting at home.  This wasn't a problem until I had to do something on eastern standard time, like go to the doctor or meet a friend for lunch.  For those of you that I didn't get to see during this trip, I'm pleading temporary insanity.  Forgive me.

My body would completely rebel on me by falling asleep for hours when I was suppose to just catch a short nap before going out.  Or,  I would jump out of the car and go on about my business while the car is still running. LOL.  I will apologize to my girl Tammie in public for doing that twice while she was visiting.  I'm sure she didn't feel comfortable getting in the car with me driving after witnessing that mishap.  

My short term memory was shot during this experiment and my work days took an interesting turn between the hours of 4 and 5am.  I became either a total crab or I would break into hysterical laughter at the corniest joke.  My patience changed from: 

1, "oh that's okay everybody messes up every now and then,
2, "no worries, at least you are learning,"
3 "okay maybe we have a problem, let's work on that."

to:

1, "why are you coming to me with this nonsense, you should know this already!"

Needless to say I'm sure I took some years off of my life during this five week experiment or at least shortened a few telomeres. LOL.  The good news is I'm heading back to the continent.  I'm still not going back to Nairobi yet, but at least I'm only an hour behind in Johannesburg.  Hopefully I will get back to some sort of normal routine in a short period of time.  I'm sure my colleagues, employees and manager will be happy when I do.  

So, tune in next week when I hope to be writing from Nairobi once again.  It should be interesting because I feel like I have to make the adjustment all over again.  The Starbucks withdrawal has already started!! Pray for me!

Asante sana,

Della Rochelle
Copyright (c) 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams

The Contrast

Habari,

Happy New Year everybody!  I know it has been a LONG time since I’ve submitted a post.  SO much has happened since then I don’t even know where to start.  First of all, I have been on the run, catching up and reconnecting ever since I touched down in Philadelphia airport on December 17^th. 

It is very obvious how much my mother missed me while I was in Nairobi.  Even before I got to go to my own home, she had me chauffeuring her around.  Now, I had just spent almost a full day travelling from Nairobi and she just had to have me run her to the store and to play her lottery.  SMH.  I missed you too mom.

The differences in environment were clear as soon as I touched down.  It's like night and day.  First it is good to be a US citizen returning home.  There’s no long wait in the immigration line waiting to be abused by the officials. LOL.  You just breeze through the line.  Welcome home!  The next contrast was the fact that I got to get behind the wheel of a rental car and drive myself around.  I didn’t realize how much I missed driving.  I almost lost my mind coming out of the parking lot.  I think I reached 80 mph before I realized I was speeding.  LOL.  I never would have been able to do that in Nairobi because the roads would have torn the car up.  I wasn’t use to the smooth roads.

After my mother finished using me, I headed home to my humble abode.  I was greeted by a sparkling clean home.  My mother must have cleaned every nook and cranny of my home.  The wood floors were shining so much I was almost blinded.  Good job Mom!  I really do appreciate you taking care of the house while I was gone. 

The absolute best part of returning home was lying down in my fabulous bed.  Those of you who have followed the blog know that I have a problem with the ‘hard as bricks’ beds in Kenya.  OMG!  I slept until my body hurt.  I forgot how good my bed feels.  Readjusting to the Kenyan beds will be hard.  SMH

I had to work from home the first week I spent in the US.  Now that doesn’t sound too bad until you factor in working on Nairobi time.  The first couple of days weren’t bad because I was still on Nairobi time, but as the week went on, my body thought I was crazy.  I worked up to December 23^rd and then I worked hard to get my body on east coast time. 

Christmas was amazing!  My mom had all of her children under one roof for the first time in almost a decade.  There were grands and great-grands presence so she was in her glory.  I did some shopping while in Nairobi, but of course I had to continue my tradition of shopping on Christmas Eve.  Yes, I know I’m crazy, but there’s just something about being out there the day before Christmas that makes me really feel the season.

The next adventure was travelling to Las Vegas with my cousin Nikki.  Now, I thought I would have scandalous stories that I couldn’t tell you, but it was pretty tame.  The shopping spree that I went on made me realize that I don’t do much shopping in Nairobi.  That’s actually good for my finances.   I did even damage in Las Vegas to make up for the six months in Nairobi.  SMH

The next couple of weeks were filled with trips down south to visit family and friends and catching up with people in the Philadelphia area.  I am so sick of restaurant food now.  I’m sure I gained 10 pounds since I’ve been home.  SMH.  Returning to Nairobi will be good for my health. LOL.  I lose weight there without trying…its slow, but inevitable.   

Speaking of returning to Nairobi, my stay in the States has been extended while I wait for my temporary work papers.  They will take about 3 weeks so it looks like I will be in the States until the first of February.  Returning to Nairobi and adjusting will be much more difficult now that I’ve been home so long.  BUT, I’m going to enjoy the comfort while I can.  LOL.   I will see you here next people.

Asante Sana,

Della Rochelle

Copyright © 2012 by Della Rochelle Williams